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Summer sun is electrifying me
It opens me, softens me
Despite traumas and dramas
I am free
.
I am flooded with memories of summers past...
Horse back riding through a swamp by the sea in st Simons island Age 8
Galloping in the salt marsh
Floating on my belly on a float in South Carolina when I was 10
talking with another girl for hours until the backs of our thighs were so sunburned I couldn’t sit the next day
Making out in a field with my first love with not a soul for miles
Age 16
Making love in the tent during a thunderstorm Age 17
No one could hear how loud we were because of the loud thunder and rain
Sleeping in a teepee in Montana
Under a tarp in Oregon
Age 22
Being read children’s books by lovers in rainstorms
Fed ice cream
Sung to in the bath tub
Sitting in the back of a pickup truck in the middle of the Amazon age 13
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Summer floods me with feelings of freedom
Wild Love
.
Life is always bestowing magic upon us
But in the moment sometimes our full PRESENCE is not PRESENT
.
How many moments
that we miss the magic of,
How we get lost in what we don’t have
The fear thoughts
What is “wrong”
Instead of what is RIGHT
Who didn’t text
Instead of who did
What $ we didn’t make
Instead of what $ we did
What we still need to “do”
Instead what we are doing...
.
And so the magic is lost on us
The trees are saying “play w me!”
A lover is cooking you dinner and rubbing your feet
And yet we are stuck to the phone
Stuck in our heads
Ruminating on past and planning future
Stuck in inner “aloneness”
.
Yes, we also must honor the pains and the woes moving through us,
But why not let them breathe through our skins so we accept those broken bits as US
We bring them to the moment and let the sun kiss them too
Fearlessly opening to the present moment despite the pains of the past and the uncertainties of the future
.
How can we land?
We breathe
We surrender
We don’t give a fuck
We laugh
We love bigger
We give more presence to the people around us even when it’s uncomfortable
We speak up and don’t hold back .
And then the magic begins to meets us.
.
I’ll meet you there...in a hug. A river. A bellowing laugh. A tear, in a pocket of magic.
.
Happy Sunday.

Can you feel my Wild Heart? It’s always there, spilling onto people, burning bright, being “too much,” dripping tears and blood and poetry and sweet kisses onto those I love and orbit around. Loving the divine. Loving myself. Softening. Opening. Again and again.
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Wanna know how to free and awaken your own heart?! Join me as a featured speaker at Symposium of Wild Hearts, a 7 day FREE digital summit beginning on the fiery first day of Summer with my dear @thegirlfriendmanifesto. I lead a Roxo style practice of embodiment and self seduction and divine feminine heart. Yours for free!😘♥️🧜🏻‍♀️🌹💋
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The digital gathering will give you direct access to curious conversations with 21 of the top healers, experts, luminaries, gentlemen, and wild woman discussing 'the pursuit of the whole.'
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You can listen for FREE for a limited time, or keep my conversation or the entire symposium. Learn more here! www.symposiumofwildhearts.com/symposium/alexandra - more in stories today!
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#symposiumofwildhearts
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Pic by @ed__herrera

Its hard to put into words some of the magic that happens in the unseen worlds, in meditation, prayer, when doing the inner work. I try and explain here saying things like “feels like fireworks under my skin” and “like warm honey dripping through my insides.” It also feels like more internal space. Like less clutter. More vastness. Like sometimes after morning practice I expand as big as the room and the block and just keep getting bigger. Then one little fear thought shrinks me down to pea size again. And then one breath into love expands me beyond my physical limits again.
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It may seem scary or weird to spend so much time tending unseen worlds. Worlds that no one but YOU will truly understand. Your inner landscape. Your inner garden. It may feel more productive to tend the outer worlds. The social media. Your look. Your income. Your friend group. Your goals. But tending the inner life, your inner garden is an investment that will last beyond all your looks, all your friend groups, all your jobs, and beyond your physical life.
.
It’s an investment not quantify-able. Not fully shareable. It’s your private savings. It’s your inner dance. Your inner Feng Shui. And it feels so good to tend to it! To have your foundation be strong, so that in the passing winds of life- as your external shifts, your internal is strong and steady.
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My practice has been the glue that has held me together since I first sat on a meditation cushion with a candle and some nag champa and a journal and a cup of maté. 15 years later I still have my cup of maté, my little journal, and my inner garden just keeps getting more colorful, more wild, more spacious, deeper, with more portals, more doors, more treasure chests, more secret passageways.
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Thank you NYC for helping me tend my inner garden this week, to @pkrippa for bringing me into deep practice this week on the meditation cushion at @theassemblagenyc and also to @lisanelsonlevine for taking me to Amma satsang at @maharosenyc and to @moundsimone.
Magic happens when you show up, when you open, and when you take risks in the name of your own inner expansion.
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Wishing you love and many open doors and windows in your heart today.

Taking 15 minutes before a client to put my feet on the Earth and lay on a rock in the park. Solstice is approaching and my inner Pisces is fantasizing about running barefoot through a field and making love under a waterfall and pulling figs off trees and eating them til juice runs down my face, listening to cicadas and chasing fireflies in the night...
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Do you need some summer retreating and letting go and breaking free?!! Come retreat with me! I can’t promise juicy figs but I can promise fire ceremony, feet in grass, transformational work, gathering with other women, finding community who is REAL authentic wild free broken messy intense weird introverts and extroverts at @kripalucenter July 5-8 with me and @the_numinous!
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We are going to dance and move with @_kyma_ and me guiding Goddess embodiment practice. We are going to fiercely look at whatever is blocking our FULL expression and we are gonna break free. YUM.
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And as for today, in New York City, I can be found in Central Park looking for a warm rock to lay on like a little snake, fantasizing about summer retreats and Burning Man and making out and running free. While enjoying the bustling vibes of the big city. Equally delightful and divine. 🐍♥️
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ALSO newsletter goes out today with a LOT OF JUICE AND HEART! Link in bio to get on the list 🌹

It can be scary to look at the collective pain and trauma happening right now in our country, and around its borders. Especially if you are an extremely sensitive person. Maybe it hurts bad in your body to look. Maybe it triggers your own abandonment or abuse wounds. But if you can engage, make some calls, donate funds, spread the word, and speak up I bet you it will be incredibly healing to your own inner child, your sense of self, and the overcoming of your own trauma by tapping into your ability to help rewrite and heal cultural narratives of oppression that have always been present, but that are coming up right now for us to engage with differently if we choose.
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When I personally look at pictures of children in pain it hurts in my body. It takes me back to my own traumas, being scared and alone with strangers I didn’t know in a foreign country as a small child, not knowing when I was next going to see my mom or dad and having no way to speak to them. Very different situation but triggering nonetheless. Instead of being paralyzed I choose to breathe, to engage with eyes open, to mother and love myself, and contribute however I can. That feels way way better than looking away.
.
We can’t afford to look away anymore. I’ve posted links in my stories to donate funds and call senators and accounts like @womensmarch and @together.rising have listed tons of action steps.
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Let’s continue to have real conversations here. Tough ones. Painful ones, but necessary ones. It’s healing for you, for me, for the collective, and for all the generations to come.
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Loving you. 💗
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Repost from @femalecollective 🙏🏼

Some days I wake up feeling too big for my skin
My skin feels stretched too tight around my bones
My heart feels too big for my chest
Everything is pulsing and moving through me like I may explode,
like in my dream last night
I swallowed fireworks and let them go off in my stomach,
Making rainbow patterns from inside my belly that echoed through the room
People clapped in the dream
As I became a living light show
When I woke my skin felt looser
My heart felt like a rainbow waterfall
Instead of a feeling like it’s living in a metal cage, for a brief moment in time -
.
As I told my friends last night
Everyone experiences reality differently
I experience it through feeling
I feel my way through life
I feel everything in my body like I am an echoing singing bowl
Or a walking wind chime
Some days a big wind blows and I am barely stirred
Other days the smallest wind turns me into walking dissonance or melodic symphony-
.
What else is there to do except surrender to be a walking light show
Or walking instrument of life though?
It’s uncomfortable at times
Yes
But it’s letting the flow of life move you and move through you
That is surrendering to the human experience instead of attempting to control it
Because
Fuck being a zombie and limiting the flow of what is
Fuck not taking risks
Not feeling things
Playing small,
Keeping it neat and tidy
Keeping it “chill”
I’m a walking light show orchestral experience
Peaceful, yes at times “Chill?” Nah
I like to laugh until I roll on the floor, swim naked, pee in the woods, make love until I can’t speak, dance until I smell of sweat and my mascara runs-
.
And anyone or anything who walks into my life and questions or “threatens” these things- my joys- who obliterates my comfort zones, and shakes me until I break, is my great great guru, my teacher. Because when you have been shaken, and when you fall, and you turn into a mess, a broken pile of pieces of “you” and it hurts so bad but you reassemble and stand anyway again, with fire in your belly, that moment is
EVERYTHING.
That is transformation, growth, rebirth.
.
And I wish it for you too.
.
Jai Kali Ma 🔥♥️🙏🏼 Post Rope Retreat Feels.

There are many ways to awaken
To heal
To transform
To meditate
To incite ecstasy
To transmute trauma
To transcend pain
To unite with spirit
To let go of control
To stop managing
To surrender.
.
In my Transformational Healing & Mentorship Program we just completed month 5 of our journey. We have faced our demons, our traumas, our constant dominant narratives- we have puked them and cried them and danced with them and now this weekend we surrendered them in the ropes. Accepted them. Stopped fighting them.
And
just
let
go.
.
As I have said before- you put a group of women in a room and you will likely find sexual traumas, depression and other mental health issues, abandonment issues, emotional and physical abuse, eating disorders, and almost every trauma under the sun. In a world that provides little assistance in how to deal and process this stuff, the rooms we gather in become sacred temples of deep work.
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These rooms are full of bravery. Strong hearts. Courageous spirits not afraid to look at the hurts. Feel them. Accept them. Integrate them. In order to enjoy life more, land in the present, and be more of service.
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The healing journey and the spiritual path are spirals- continuously unwinding and uncoiling revealing joys and sadness and ecstasy and sorrow. All one in the same sea.
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This weekend with @miss_true_blue as our artist and guide, we entered into deep states of surrender. Neuroscience has studied the brains of people in suspensions and at certain points in the bondage work the brain wave responses are similar to zen monks in meditation. Alert. Yet extremely peaceful. At other points the brain states are similar to orgasm.
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That deep state, plus the physical sensation of releasing the body and giving it to the ropes, is so healing for me. I feel tremendous peace, stillness, and soul rest in the ropes.
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Thank you to everyone out there dealing with and healing their shit instead of walking around the world spewing it and projecting it onto others. This is how we shift the paradigm. By showing up.
.
Thank you to the Brave Warrior Women, pictured mid metaphor, for showing up with your courageous hearts.

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